Awful
I borrowed but, (that anthology of student writing edited by Cyril Wong) from the library on a whim and I don't regret it. It is gloriously terrible. Look:
I think this poem would be ten times better if that last line read 'or DIE!!!11' instead.
The other poem that sticks in my mind is by David Tang, who seems to be Singapore's top manufacturer of bathos: 'I Miss You' opens with 'Life seldom treats us well, / I have to strongly state' and does not get much better. It also includes the phrase 'Stygian dimness', which is a bit like saying 'catastrophic inconvenience' or 'Hitlerian naughtiness'.
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Three criticisms I did not expect to hear during stand-by-bed (locker inspection, basically) in an operational unit:
stalker
by Bernard Koh
i am not your average lover.
my bleeding heart will place his hands
on your shoulders and hold you gently -
firmly under the water until you say yes
or die.
I think this poem would be ten times better if that last line read 'or DIE!!!11' instead.
The other poem that sticks in my mind is by David Tang, who seems to be Singapore's top manufacturer of bathos: 'I Miss You' opens with 'Life seldom treats us well, / I have to strongly state' and does not get much better. It also includes the phrase 'Stygian dimness', which is a bit like saying 'catastrophic inconvenience' or 'Hitlerian naughtiness'.
Three criticisms I did not expect to hear during stand-by-bed (locker inspection, basically) in an operational unit:
'Your toothpaste tube is too small.'
'Your fork is on the right side of the spoon. Wrong! It should be on the left.'
'Your toilet paper roll. . . funny shape!'
posted by Nicholas at 2:14 PM
12 Comments:
I like the phrase 'Hitlerian naughtiness' and will be looking out for opportunities to use it.
Amen to that.
yea bernard's poem looks iffy on paper, but i think it was a cool performance piece at some jc poetry competition. more of sth to be performed than read.
Hi I like to invite you all to visit
http://www.newcreation.org.sg/homtestimonies.htm
It's certainly comedy gold, if that's what you mean.
No, that is not what i meant.
Roffle Lawl.
Those are brilliant pieces. Wish I had that book. I wish they made a cliche poem generator of some sort (they had a Dylan Thomas one).
"It's certainly comedy gold, if that's what you mean."
anonymous, Nicholas was referring to the new creation website.
I actually was referring to the poem, which is excellent comedy but piss-poor poetry, spoken or otherwise.
wow, that's mean. but funny.
I like bernard's poem.
randomly found your blog looking up recipies for buttermilk. loved the horrid poem--made me laugh! OR DIE!!!! is much better.
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